ANAISHA ✿

As soon as I entered the room, I closed the door and stood against it, my back on the door. I leaned against it, my heart thumping because of the previous events. After waiting for my heart to calm down, when my heartbeat finally became normal, I put the gifts on the bed.

A faint smile graced my lips, those gifts, their love. How gently Maa caressed my face, with soft eyes, her motherly touch reminded me of my mumma. I still remember the first time I made kheer. I was sixteen that time, Mumma was guiding me. And when I finally made it, Mumma and Papa were so happy; they hugged me. And when Ankit tasted the kheer, he liked it so much. He exclaimed to me, "Didi wow there is some magic in your hands." (Didi, wow, there is some magic in your hands.) We all laughed together at his antics—Ankit, my little brother, always dramatic. Tears filled my eyes as the sweetness of that moment mingled with a little sadness, flooding my mind with flashbacks. I wiped a tear rolling down my cheek.

Then his act on the breakfast table played in my head and my cheeks turned crimson, a shy smile tugging at my lips. He made me wear his chain—no, I mean it was his chain. He removed it from his neck and fastened it around my neck, like claiming... A faint knock on the door pulled me out of my thoughts. I composed myself because if I opened the door with red cheeks, then I was gone—a target of their teasing again.

I opened the door; it was Avni. "Bhabi maa is calling you for rituals. If you are done... please come down." (Sister-in-law, mother is calling you for the rituals. If you are done... please come down.)

"Yes... I'm coming," I replied with a soft smile.

We reached downstairs and there was my husband sitting on the couch, busy with his phone. Our eyes met and that smirk on his face. I quickly looked away.

By the afternoon, we were done with all the rituals, even the muhdikhai. Ekansh left for his office. Maa protested and scolded him a little, but he insisted he had an important meeting and would come by the evening. After he left, Avni, Lakshya, and Tanish gave me a home tour and a garden tour. There were so many flowers there but not White Tulips, my favorite.

We talked for some time, then we came inside the house. They went to their room. Maa and I talked for some time. Then she told me to take some rest.

Now I had nothing to do. So I thought of arranging my stuff in the closet. I was starting to unpack my stuff: my sarees, suits, make-up, books, jewelry, everything. One by one, luggage by luggage. And when I opened the third luggage there was my ghunghroo. A soft smile came to my lips unknowingly; I caressed them. They were my escape when the voices in my head started to suffocate me. I still remember when Nani first showed me her ghunghroo. I was five. I was so happy, curious about them. The sound of ghunghroos made me more curious. Nani used to tell me I tied them on my feet and started twirling and clapping in happiness, I was so lost in the memories. I flinched at the sudden click of the door. I looked up and the person standing there was none other than my husband, Ekansh.

Him this soon?

I blinked, confused, and turned my eyes towards the clock. It was already 6:30 in the evening. I didn't realize it was already evening.

He entered the room. I stood up from the bed, looking around. I was so lost in my thoughts that I forgot I had to arrange my things, about the mess. I looked back at him. I was anxious about his reaction because my belongings were scattered across the bed.

"I... I was unpacking my things and arranging them in the wardrobe... That's why... ummm, I…. I'm sorry, I'll clean your bed. Just give me five minutes," I murmured, embarrassed, quickly turning to gather my jewelry and make-up scattered on the bed.

"Wait," his sharp voice made me stop in my track.

I turned towards him slowly. He started taking slow steps, closing the distance between us. When he finally stood in front of me, I looked up in his eyes. His dark, black eyes staring into my soul with quiet intensity.

His hands gripping my wrist, he made me sit on the couch. Kneeling in front of me, he took my both hands in his, softly, gently. The warmth of his hands relaxed me a little.

"There is no You or Me here now. It's our bed, it's our room. What is mine is yours too. You are my wife, Anaisha. It's us here, only us. Do you understand, wife?" His voice was soft but firm, as if he wanted to eradicate every single doubt and every last hesitation I held.

A warmth spread through my heart by his words, his gesture, his sincerity.

I froze for some time, just searching his face, and I found nothing but honesty.

With my slightly moist eyes and a faint smile on my lips, I just nodded.

He was gazing into my soul with unknown emotions in his eyes. He took a deep breath and stood up.

"Okay, I'm going to the study."

"Okay." I whispered

With that, he turned on his heels and left the room. I started arranging my stuff again.

Finally done with arranging the wardrobe. By then, it was already 8 at night. I decided to help with cooking. I went downstairs. Maa, Dadi, and Papa were already there, sitting on the couch in the living room. Avni and Lakshya were bickering about something, and Tanish was busy on his phone.

When Maa saw me, she called me over with a soft smile, "Come sit beta." (Come sit, child.)

I sat beside her on the couch. "Beta kal pagphere ki rasam ke liye tum apni mummy ke Ghar Jana hai. Ekansh chhod dega tumhe agar rukna chao toh ruk Jana tum." (Child, tomorrow you have to go to your mother's house for the pagphera ritual. Ekansh will drop you; you can stay if you want to.) she explained with a soft smile.

My parents' house, and suddenly my smile began to fade . How could I go there again when my parents told me not to return ever again to their house on my bidaai? (Farewell) How will they react? But then how will I tell Maa that my parents don't want me to visit them, they don't want to see my face, they despise me so much? I was just a taint to them, not their daughter anymore? Why... why do I deserve to think this? What did I do to deserve this, their hate? I don't want to see that hate again in the eyes of the people for whom I was once their pride, but now I was  just a girl who's a shame to them, a girl they adored once, now so utterly despised they can barely look at me. My stomach twisted.

"Arey Ekansh aao beta." (Oh, Ekansh, come, child.) Maa’s voice broke my the chain of my thoughts. I turned my head. He was coming towards us.

"Ekansh beta kal anaisha ko uske mummy ke Ghar le jana pagphere ki rasam ke liye." (Ekansh, child, take Anaisha to her mother's house tomorrow for the pagphera ritual.) Maa instructed.

He looked at me for a few seconds as if he knew about the storm brewing in my heart, maybe, and then he nodded.

"But why tomorrow, bhabi can go after some days na. Abhi toh humare paas aayi hai." (But why tomorrow, can't sister-in-law go after a few days? She just came to us.) Avni protested. She was genuinely sad

"Yes, we'll miss bhabi. Please bhabi don't go." (Yes, we'll miss sister-in-law. Please, sister-in-law, don't go.) Lakshya pleaded with puppy eyes.

"Mann toh humara bhi nahi hai apni bahu ko bhejne ka lekin rasam hai . Usko jana toh padega." (We don't want to send our daughter-in-law either, but it's a ritual. She will have to go.) Dadi stated firmly.

"Beta jaldi wapas aa jana. Ghar Khali lagega meri beti ke bina." (Child, come back soon. The house will feel empty without my daughter.) Papa said softly.

Maa caressed my face lovingly. "Sahi kaha aapne." (You are absolutely right.)

"Aap kitne din ke liye jaa rahi hain bhabi?" (For how many days are you going, sister-in-law?) Tanish asked in a sad voice.

Despite the pain in my heart, a small smile appeared on my lips, seeing their affection for me.

"Main kal shaam ko hi wapas aa jaungi." (I will return tomorrow evening itself.) I assured with a soft smile.

"Ekansh shaam ko office se aate waqt le aayega beta tumhe." (Ekansh will bring you back in the evening on his way from the office, child.) Papa stated.

"Jii papa," (Yes, Papa,) he nodded and looked at me.

~•~•~•~•~•~✧•°•°

I was silent throughout the entire dinner, my mind consumed by the thoughts of my family's rejection, their disgust-filled eyes for me. Everyone was chatting; the siblings were laughing, teasing each other. But me ? My appetite was gone. I was just flicking the spoon on my food.

"Anaisha beta kya hua? Khana kyu nahi kha rahi ho? Acha nahi hai kya ? Kuch aur banau?" (Anaisha, child, what happened? Why aren't you eating food? Is it not good? Should I make something else?) Maa asked in concern.

"No maa I'm eating." With a forced smile on my face, I started eating.

When dinner was over, I started picking up plates to wash them, but Maa stopped me, saying the servants would take care of it and that I should take a rest . I didn't argue and came to our room.

We entered the room. Ekansh closed the door. I moved to the closet to change. After my night routine, when I came back into the room, Ekansh was sitting on the edge of the bed, scrolling through his phone.

When he heard my footsteps, he looked up at me, as if searching my face. After a few minutes, he spoke up, "Anaisha, if you don't want to go, then tell me. I'll talk to Maa."

"No, it's okay. Dadi said it's a ritual, so I have to go," I responded.

"You don't have to think about anything or anyone. If you don't want to go, just tell me. I'm your husband. I'll simply say that I have an important meeting and I can't take you to your parents' house." His voice was soft, but the firmness in it remained.

"But why?" Before I realized, the question escaped my lips, almost a whisper.

His brows frowned, but his expression was still firm. "Because I'm your husband. And I can see you were silent since the time Maa told about the pagphera. I don't know the reason, but if you don't want to go, no one will pressure you for the ritual. Just tell me."

A faint smile knowingly came to my lips, my eyes glistening with tears. "No, I'm fine. We will go visit my parents tomorrow." I said softly

He searched my face for a moment, then nodded. "Okay, let's sleep now."

I nodded.

We lay down on our respective sides of the bed, facing the ceiling. But my mind was flooded with thoughts of the man lying beside me. I turned my head towards him. His breathing was slow, face relaxed—he was asleep.

And me? I was just looking at him, my husband. The man who barely knows me, ready to take everything on him because he thought I wasn't okay. He didn't ask the reason, he didn't ask why I was silent, he just stood by my side, offering reassurance, without questioning anything.

Of course, he knows about that incident. He was the trustee of my college, the CEO of the Rajvansh empire.

When I told him before our marriage, he stopped me in the middle and said “It was your past. I can't change that, and honestly, I'm no one to question it either. Everyone has a past. Let the past stay in the past."

But he didn't know the full truth. It's not like I want to hide my past from him... hell no. But I don't have the courage to tell him right now. How will he react after knowing the entire truth? Will he judge me, too? These questions always terrified me. But of course, I can't hide it from him, and I don't want to.

I will tell him, not now, but maybe one day... the day when this fear of being judged again does not overpower me.

With these thoughts, I closed my eyes and sleep took over me……

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